All Women Do
Hating women is still here. I don't hate us, though.
Season 20, Episode 12: All Women Do
27 March 2026 – The internet goes wild with misogyny, and I am a writer and a woman so I must think about it.
It’s easy to be insecure. It’s common. It’s practically a crucial piece of every woman’s development in this day and age, where we exist as both physical people and also formless internet souls.
I am especially formless internet soul, as I suspect many other people on Substack are.
Despite finding a social media site with what seems to be a greater degree of acceptance, thoughtful opinions, etc. we are all inevitably still tied up in trends and other, more harmful apps.
If you’re not a formless internet soul to some degree, please send us your tips and tricks.
Personally, it is inescapable. Though I exist firmly in my body, a girl with hopes and dreams and thoughts so far from the internet, I still find myself here. Writing for people I don’t know, who I appreciate nonetheless. Plus, you’re here, too. You’re reading this and I automatically feel less alone in my split-being state.
Imagine meeting an online friend in person for the first time.
I cringe at the thought. Despite presenting myself honestly online, there is an unshakable gap. I probably dress differently than you expect. I’m quieter than I seem online. My mannerisms are all over the place, sometimes wildly animated sometimes still and seemingly disjointed.
I’m sorry I’m not what you expect, I am simply two people at once. More than that, I am hundreds of people at once.
That is the thing with big dreams and ideas, I can’t be singular for my desire to be everything is too strong. And in the end, we all come out disappointed because no person can be everything.
Here enters insecurity and fear. Goodbye potential, optimism, and moments of joy.
Most of the time, I feel safe and like my true self while existing online. I express myself in ways I’m too scared to in real life, I share secrets without fear of them being manipulated.
That being said, the internet is also the home in which insecurities are born and raised. Expectations for how someone is supposed to act, to look, for what someone is supposed to want out of life thrive on the internet.
You are supposed to be this. We accept everyone! But you have to be this or you will know our acceptance is underlined by judgement.
These sentiments are most often pushed upon women, specifically young and vulnerable women.
For someone in their early 20s like me, the internet has likely been a staple in your life for longer than is probably appropriate. In my case, this access was okay for a while. I watched Minecraft videos made for kids. It was fun and silly and absolutely shaped me into who I am.
Middle school was a different story… I was into Vine and Musically, more adult sides of YouTube, Instagram, etc. The world opened up, and I didn’t see anything negative in it at the time.
Now, looking back, some of it absolutely changed the way I think about myself for the worse. It was the rise of comparing myself to the girls on Instagram and Musically, hoping I could be like them one day. I dreamed of being online, of being idolized.
Obviously, those dreams didn’t come to fruition. I’m glad my 12-year-old internet history has been wiped from accessibility, though it has not been erased from my mind.
Now, TikTok reigns supreme in terms of social media. It’s the app which affects me negatively the most, a place where my insecurities thrive.
I see so much discourse over women in any way you can imagine. What we’re supposed to look like, behave like, etc. It’s exhausting, and as much as I try to prevent it from affecting me, it certainly does.
Incels are on the rise, at least on my for you page. Men who are insecure in their own rights, projecting that insecurity onto others. I firmly believe that people who respond are just pleasing them, thought I admit I spend time scrolling through the comment sections of people fighting about the proper shape of a woman’s hips and the height a man must be to date.
I’m comfortable with how I look. It’s not like the girls I idolize, and I don’t look in the mirror and instantly love myself. Still, I don’t really want to change.
The trendiness of being skinny is back, which never makes me feel good. My mindset, though, has shifted in recent months to prioritizing my own physical and mental health. It’s easier said than done, but I like to take a step back and recognize that no one knows my health and who I am aside from myself. Those things belong to me.
Take back control of yourself; it has been wrestled away by formless internet souls who do not know you.
I started noticing a rise (a re-rise?) in misogyny with the release of Supergirl (2026), the second feature-length film in the DCU.
Its reception has been quite negative, as well as vehemently different to that of Superman (2025).
Some takes are extremely valid—the themes are diluted, the film isn’t accurate to the comics, Lobo takes too much of the spotlight, etc. See my letterboxd review to read what I believe is a very valid take.
Other opinions are not so valid—Supergirl is weak, boring, ugly.
There is a clear undercurrent of hatred for women driving this narrative hating on the film. Unsurprisingly, it’s driven by similar crowds to the people criticizing women online.
It’s not difficult for me to admit this wasn’t a five star movie for me. Not even close to it, really. It’s also not difficult for me to recognize that it’s on par with other films of the genre, even better than some: Thor Love and Thunder, The Dark Phoenix, and Madame Web to name a few.
I think Supergirl has more thematic merit than some of these similarly (or more negatively) rated films of the genre.
Moviegoers expect more from films now. That’s my take on why so many superhero films do badly. My other, more controversial take is that many enjoyers of this genre don’t think women have any place in it.
Spiderman: Brand New Day is going to do well. Doomsday is going to do well. These are huge, highly anticipated films that I myself will probably enjoy. It sucks that people didn’t have that hype for Supergirl, and many who did wanted it to be as good as Superman (myself included).
I think the writing teams behind woman-led superhero films are often lackluster, the budgets low and insignificant in comparison to their male counterparts. It is automatically assumed that these films will do worse, so they get treated as lesser.
Supergirl was a really great representation of femininity. Kara is messy and sad and kind. She is scared and unafraid simultaneously. She is multifaceted to a degree most female characters don’t get.
I’m hopeful for her future in this new DC Universe, as you should be too. Good things are coming for women in the genre, which has been backed by women right alongside men for decades.
I’m currently reading A Room of One’s Own by Virginia Woolf, a short novel discussing women’s ability to be writers, to live alone, to support themselves financially.
It’s beautifully written, and I recommend everyone read it.
Though she is discussing the mid 20th century, readers today can not only recognize the lengths to which we’ve developed, but also the ways in which things are, tragically, the same.
A section a little over halfway through discusses the rising amount of female authors. Historically, men dominated the arts sphere while women existed as homemakers.
Now, as I stalk the shelves of a bookstore, after driving there on my own, I see so much art created by women. I can choose to read novels primarily written by women, seeing perspectives akin to my own.
This simple act seems like second nature to us, to read a romance novel by our favorite female author or an actress’ memoir or a contemporary poetry book by a woman who just finished her MFA.
Place yourself in history for a moment. Realize that eighty, sixty, thirty years ago the lives of women were so different, and we have so many opportunities now that we couldn’t have had before.
So, yes, men on the internet (and in real life) spread harmful stereotypes and misinformation, intending to diminish us. They, perhaps without even realizing it, wish to take us back three hundred years to eliminate the competition they feel we bring. Really, they are just not used to a level playing field.
A field which, continuously, is tilted in their favor.
The thing I have come to learn about women, especially about women who write, is that our history is our momentum. We cannot stop perservering because those before us did not.
Words men say online, derogatory and painful as they may be, are nothing more than words. Hateful actions are nothing more than disgusting displays of internalized fear.
So, I am insecure. I struggle to accept myself amidst the constant dialogue against who I am.
I persevere anyway.
I do it anyway.
All adventurous women do. All women do.
P.S. This article became something I wasn’t quite expecting, but I hope it was fruitful in some way! I haven’t even watched all of Girls, so someone yell at me if I’m using that reference wrong. It felt right!
P.P.S Daughter from Hell (album) thoughts coming soon :)









Oh my gosh, Aaliyah! This one hits home, very relatable...particularly about the internet being the home for insecurities. Very well written <3
I love following your thought process through this piece!! This line stood out “I’m sorry I’m not what you expect, I am simply two people at once. More than that, I am hundreds of people at once” so often I feel like throughout my 20s. I’ve grapple with the many versions of myself that I believe to be true, but I’m wondering which ones will stick